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Discover yourself before marriage

Updated: Jan 11

Good Afternoon, Lavenders. Congratulations on making it to the end of another month. I hope you had a fabulous month; my month was amazing. Today's blog post is a short one, and I hope you enjoy it. As always, remember to like, share, comment, and subscribe. :)


The eight-letter word that no one gets tired of. You know what it is: MARRIAGE. This word has been used and overused, and we hear it everywhere. Marriage is beautiful, Love is powerful, and Intimacy is fantastic. Females are structured and raised to care for and structure their lives towards Love, marriage, skills, future home, and children. In parts of the world, like Africa and Asia, arranged marriage is often encouraged by both family sides. Girls as young as 13 years old are forced into marriages they have no interest in. 



Marriage is an institution that God created. It was created for harmony, unity, and partnership. Marriage is beyond children, sex, and Love; it is a partnership to fulfill a purpose. Have you ever heard the phrase, "discover yourself before marriage"? If you are a female, you probably have. Depending on the individual, this phrase might be a cliche, but it is the root and depth of a successful marriage. Many young females go or walk into marriage with the mindset and mentality that once they get married, their lives will be perfect, complete, and whole. But the thing is, this mindset and mentality is developed right from their childhood. Girls are trained to cook, clean, sweep, etc, to be the perfect wife and mother. But the missing piece in this entire puzzle is young females discovering themselves before marriage.

I have five questions to ask you, and I want you to answer honestly. The first is, can you love yourself fully and completely without your boyfriend, partner, or spouse? The second is, what do you have going for yourself? The third is, what are your long-term goals and dreams? The fourth is whether you can see yourself beyond motherhood and marriage; the fifth is, who has your heart? I will answer these questions myself. I can love myself fully and completely without a boyfriend, partner, or spouse, but I have not gotten to that point. I still tell myself I cannot wait to meet the right guy. It is funny but shows the missing piece in my life: self-love. My second response is to my blog and podcast. My third response is to become a medical doctor, a best-selling author, own my foundation, and make significant contributions to the world. My fourth response is yes, I can see myself beyond motherhood and marriage, but when it happens to me, it will take up most of my life. Finally, my heart belongs to my Creator: God. 



Females are more than marriage. We are strong, confident, unique, creative, and beautiful beings. We are intelligent, have so much potential within us, and must utilize our potential. As young females, we have so much ahead of us, and we must discover our purpose, worth, and selves before involving another individual in our lives. Love is beautiful; it is lovely. Marriage is fantastic; it is truly unique. But what must come first before both of these is self-love and discovery. Do you love yourself enough that the man who falls in Love with you can love you the same way, and it will last you for the rest of your life? Think about this deeply. If your answer is no, begin today. If your answer is yes, continue. You will and are an inspiration to many females around you, even if you might not realize it. More females must see other females thriving and soaring without Love and marriage. Love yourself, know yourself, and leave the rest to God. 



As a young, growing female, I am still on a journey to discovering myself. I have made significant improvements this past year in my life, but there is still a long way to go. I would think and dream about marriage and children throughout my childhood and teenage years. But in my nineteenth year of life, this began to change. One thing that has helped me navigate through self-discovery is reading books on purpose and discovering my purpose. One of my favorite books I read last Christmas Break is In Pursuit of Purpose: The Key to Personal Fulfillment by Myles Munroe. I recommend reading this book. It does not matter if you are a young teen or adult in your 20s, 30s, or 40s. You will learn a thing or two from this book. 



Thank you so much for reading. God Bless You Greatly. Remember to likesharecomment, and subscribe. Have a great rest of your day and week. See you in May. 


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